How to use the 5 love languages to strengthen your relationship

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This article was written by Bongiwe Mati.

Relationships are more fun when both parties play their part in nurturing the union, and spending time with each other to create special memories.

There are many ways to show your partner how you feel about them, and often, those do not need one to spend a fortune to attain.

While people have different love languages, others might be lucky to have similar in a relationship. It is very important to find what your partner’s love language is, in order to make sure that both of you feel appreciated.

We take a look at the five common love languages and how partners in a relationship can use them to strengthen their bond.

Words of affirmation – No person in-love can get tired of hearing the words, I love you. These words can be said in many other ways, like writing an I love you note to your partner, sending a text while at work telling your partner you are thinking about them, or even checking to see if they have eaten and how their day at work is. Health related centre Healthline shares that all that matter is that you acknowledge your partner through words.

Receiving Gifts – Gifts are easily an act of love, they simply mean that the person was thinking about you and decided to give you something in return to show that. These are not necessarily measured in monetary value as small gestures that show that a person put some thought in the gift matter too. “People whose love language is receiving gifts enjoy being gifted something that is both physical and meaningful. The key is to give meaningful things that matter to them and reflect their values, not necessarily yours,” says Fariha Mahmud-Syed, a couples’ psychotherapist.

Acts of services – Acts of service are the cutest ways of showing love. They are usually small things like taking your partners car for a wash without them asking. Getting their things sorted while they are at work or rubbing their feet after a long day at work. Fahira shares that this act is popular to those whose love language is “actions speak louder than words.”

Quality time – Quality time is not only being around your partner while busy with other things. It basically means dedicating time just to be with your partner, listening to each other and doing things that you both love. “Distractions, postponed activities, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Whether it’s spending uninterrupted time talking or doing activities together, you deepen your connection with each others through sharing time, says Helpguide.org, an online resources for mental health and wellness education and support.

Physical touch – Physical touch such as hugs, holding hands, and kisses are a good way of showing love and affection. If these are used together while affirming your partner such gesture according to studies is said to contain lasting impression in the partners mind. “Appropriate touches convey warmth and safety, while physical neglect can drive a wedge between you and your partner”, adds Family Centre, a safe space for all ages,  cultures, gender identities and more.

This article first appeared on Bona.