How to make use of your alone time

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This article was written by Qaqamba Falithenjwa.

Most people find pleasure in spending time alone, it gives them peace and according to science, spending some time in solitude is good for your mental health.

This doesn’t only apply to the self-reserved kind of people, even the outgoing social butterflies need a little bit of “me-time.”

Medical information hub Healthline states that it is first important to distinguish between being alone and being lonely as these two might be misinterpreted as the same thing but are not. “Maybe you’re a person who absolutely basks in solitude. You’re not antisocial, friendless, or loveless. You’re just quite content with alone time. In fact, you look forward to it. That’s simply being alone, not being lonely.”

The publication further explains that on the other hand, loneliness is when you’re surrounded by loved ones and friends but your relationships with them are shallow and they leave you feeling distant and empty, and perhaps being all alone makes you depressed and yearn for company. That is loneliness.

There are strategies that one can implement into their time alone to make it more efficient, relaxing and at the same time exciting. Several health publications suggested a few;

Practise positive selfishness: Author, podcaster & newsletter writer, Francesca Specter wrote a book titled “Alonement: How to be alone and absolutely own it.” In her book, she defines positive selfishness as doing anything you want, shamelessly, as long as it doesn’t harm anybody else. According to her, you’re more likely to be willing to make compromises when you’re around other people once your own needs have been satisfied. “Positive selfishness’ could involve lunch at your favourite café without inviting a friend; watching an eagerly anticipated film at the cinema without taking your partner; enjoying an afternoon off for a spa treatment alone. Whatever it may be, if it’s not hurting anyone, give yourself permission to please yourself.”

Take a social media break: Happifull, an online health and wellbeing magazine, states that while social media isn’t always harmful or problematic, you should spend some time to yourself if looking through your feeds makes you feel anxious and excluded. “You have no idea if those people are truly happy or just giving the impression that they are. Either way, it’s no reflection on you. So, take a deep breath and put it in perspective.” The magazine suggests that you try putting a 48-hour social media restriction and setting a daily limit of 10 to 15 minutes for yourself and sticking to it to see if it makes a difference.

Learn a new skill: “List ten skills you’ve wanted to learn but haven’t gotten around to. Spending time in solitude allows you to concentrate all your energy on what you want to focus on without worrying about another person’s desires,” states Better Help. The publication explains that time spent alone may also stimulate creative ideas and that taking up new interests might help you develop your patience, discover more about yourself, and find new ways to express yourself. According to Better Help, you are required to think about stepping beyond your comfort zone in this phase, whenever possible, and try to visit a new place every week, even if you’re not ready to take up a new interest or hobby. “You might find that exploring new places alone is rewarding, as you can go at your own pace and follow your own schedule.”

Take a musical vacation: Depression can be driven by loneliness and a sense of social exclusion for certain people, therefore the above-mentioned publication advises that you take a musical reconnection with yourself. “Music is a standard go-to solution to escape challenges or relate with others, and it may serve to immerse yourself in a universe of emotion.”

This article first appeared on Bona.